Top 10 Sports Videos Ever...
Written by Benn Hodapp, Friday July 24 2009
I came up with this idea roughly a week ago, but it wasn't something I could just rush into. I didn't want to just find 10 kinda cool sports vids and throw them up here in order to just get it done. I had to think a good long time about what were the best things I have ever seen.
Some of those trick basketball shot videos are pretty cool, but you won't find them here because if given enough time I could recreate them with a handy cam and so could you. I chose things that over the course of my YouTube-watching life have simply shocked and awed me. Some are funny, some are silly and some are just obscene in their perfection.
So here goes...
10 - Joe Namath embarrasses self; entertains millions
'Stru-guh-ling', v.
1. To make an ass out of yourself on camera during an NFL broadcast
2. Thirty two vodka-cranberries followed by a confusing lust for Suzy Kolber
3. A legend shrinking down to nothing in a matter of seconds
This video is two parts funny, five parts sad and 12 parts Jack Daniel's. I remember seeing it live and being really, really uncomfortable. Suzy Kolber handled it so well that methinks she should work somewhere other than ESPN. I bet she got lambasted back at the office for handling it with class. I am too young to remember Joe as a football player, so this is the lasting image of him for me. For many little boys back in the 60s, however, this might have been a devastating blow.
9 - Barry Sanders makes people look stupid
Sweet fantastic Jesus I love Barry Sanders. He is by a wide margin the best RB I ever saw. The things he could do were inhuman. Had he not walked away from the game basically still in his prime he would hold the rushing record by an insurmountable margin. Emmitt Smith cannot hold Barry's jock, folks. With Smith's line Sanders would still be running right now. Watch the move he puts on at 46 seconds in and feel your calf muscles snap.
8 - Bo Jackson in Tecmo Bowl
So I went a little bit out of the realm with this one, but anyone who grew up with Tecmo Bowl knows how preposterously awesome Bo Jackson was. He was easily 4x faster than everyone else in the game. The fellow playing here makes quite a show of draining an entire quarter of action while running for a 99-yard TD that actually covered about 16 miles. Football games may be more realistic these days, but I think we can all agree that they are nowhere near as fun as Tecmo Bowl.
7 - Parkour AKA 'Real Life Matrix'
So this may not technically be a sport (not in the traditional sense anyway) but the athleticism required to do this stuff is nearly unfathomable. Not to mention the fact that making a wrong move even a single time can (and likely would) result in death. I am sure you have seen some of this parkour or 'free running' stuff before, but it's just amazing to me. The dude in red at :58 runs two-thirds of the way up a wall and sticks the landing on the way down. Good God. I fall on my ass once a month just getting out of bed. These gentlemen are sick, sick individuals...but I love them.
6 - Sam McGuffie makes a mockery of high school football
Your initial reaction might be that it's high school so who cares? There's always someone who's better than everyone else. But...this much better? I don't know how one can even become this much better than everyone. If you chained your 13-year-old in the basement with nothing to do but work out and do agility drills 24 hours a day he would not be half as good as this kid. He went on to Michigan and has since transferred to Rice. Who knows how good he will be in the college ranks, but he certainly has the skills. His runs at 3:41 and 4:45 will drop your jaw, I guarantee it.
5 - Doug Christie busts Rick Fox's greasy chin...38 times
Because, that's why. Plus Fox tried to chase Christie down in the tunnel and got his ass beat again. Double fail for one of the biggest dirtbags in the history of sports. It gets funnier with each subsequent pwning. Please excuse the laughably stupid music.
4 - Edwin Baptiste forgets that this ball was uncatchable
Insane. Many of us have dreamed of making this catch and have attempted to do it. In the pool. With a Nerf football. Thrown by your friend. From 10 feet away. When you expected it. I don't care that this is Morgan State vs. Winston-Salem State. It is just the most hideous thing I have ever seen on a football field.
3 - Vince Carter puts his privates on Frederic Weis' forehead
The best part of this video is the French announcers going absolutely insane while watching the replays. The oddest thing about it is actually the fact that Vin Baker was on the Olympic basketball team. Jesus. No wonder we sucked for those few years. Weis, a 7-footer, reportedly had two round indentations on his face for weeks.
2 - Jason McElwain will make you cry
I hate ESPN, but Tom Rinaldi never fails to make me feel like a complete idiot crying my eyes out because of some random little league team in Alaska that won a championship despite its pitcher having only eight fingers or something. From 1:35 - 2:11 if the hair on your arm doesn't stand up you officially have no soul. I have seen this 50 times and it still happens. I remember telling my friend (who doesn't care about sports) to watch the story when it replayed on SportsCenter. She called me five minutes later in tears. Ugh. I had a really hard time not putting this at No. 1, but the next clip is just otherworldly.
1 - Plano East vs. John Tyler; 1994 Texas State Championship
Plano East was down 41-17 with less than three minutes remaining. If you haven't seen how it ends I will just let you enjoy...sort of. This is memorable for so many reasons. None greater than the country bumpkin commentators losing their effing minds.
So those are my picks. Do you have any favorites that I missed? Leave them in the comments section.
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8 comments
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Benn, that was probably Nolan. The man is a miracle worker. I also remember a video of some minor leaguer actually running THROUGH the OF wall and catching a ball. And if you read my articles regularly you would have remembered the "And Boom goes the dynamite" video. My writing isn't just witty and entertaining, it is also informative.
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and to whomever got it so the videos would show up on the page: thank you. it wasn't working for me yesterday.
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Ah yes, the Ventura-Ryan clip is indeed fantastic. I especially love how Ventura waits about 8 seconds before deciding to run out. Then he got his ass whooped by a near-50 year old pissed off Texan.
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Fantastic work Benn. There are so many great videos to choose from. The only one I would have liked to see on here was Robin Ventura charging the mound after Nolan Ryan hit him. that might be my favorite sports clip of all-time.
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HA! Boom goes the dynamite completely slipped my mind. Fantastic. That poor guy.
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Nice work as usual Benn, but I have some criticisms....as usual. The Joe Namath video should be as high as #2. I saw it live and it was a train-wreck that you just couldn't look away from. "Thanks for the compliment Joe". And how in the hell did you not include the "And Boom goes the Dynamite" video? That was one of the funniest things ever.
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wow. that is the best graphic i have ever seen. hahahaha. thanks to whoever masterminded that!
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Since no one is going to post this in the featured section apparently, I'll leave a comment so maybe someone sees it that way.