Saturdiversions For The First Time In 2010
Written by Patterson Belser, Saturday January 16 2010
What do we have here? A brand new year, eh? Hmmmm, how the time, it does fly. I feel like since we have a brand new year, we need a brand new picture up top. Hopefully each of you noticed.
Yes, it is official. I have emerged from my cave and am slowly getting back to living. You know, the off-season is a rough time to try and write about any sport. While NASCAR’s off-season is very short, and we do have what is referred to as the “Silly Season”, I did not find much of it that silly.
Meanwhile, we made it through a Christmas in Alabama, a New Years in Chicago and life finds us quite busy these days…which is great. This time last year, I had already freaked out a few times about the coldness and boringness of life. No such luck this year! But, as I am making it through my day a day or two ago, I was sucked right back into NASCAR. It was almost like my RSS feeds (not even the NASCAR related ones) were trying to get my attention and say, “Hey jackass, get back to your column, you neglectful jerk!” So, I am back and getting geared up for a new season.
In my mind (and in my own self-indulgence), the only way I can think of to get back into this is with a little column that I have worked on perfecting over the last year. Something that delivers each of you the best of the worst of the best of the world of NASCAR. Oh, and I get to throw my own little twist on everything. Yes, let me welcome the new year, a new season and a new beginning here at Playerpress with the Saturdiversions!
I have been racking my brain as to what I would like the leadoff story to be here. Should I go with some of the more “big news” that has happened over the off-season? Or should I go with something completely off the beaten path to get the juices flowing? Well, I went for something slap in the middle of these two things. This is also one of the stories my RSS Reader fed to me the other day that snapped me out of my non-writing coma. For those of you that do no read this site (and for some of you that may, one day, be on this site), please everyone, go out of your way to check in with People of Wal-Mart. Sometimes, you get to see something completely crazy, such as our old King getting his bargain hunting on at Wal-Mart. And sometimes, you get to see Willie the Pimp.
Now that we have that out of the way, I am feeling a bit better. Good stuff, kids. Let us move on, shall we?
Last month, Jimmie Johnson won the AP’s Top Male Athlete of 2009. Again, moving on.
Here is somewhat of a bummer for me. I really wanted to take the train up to Milwaukee this coming summer and check out the Saturday night Nationwide race at the Milwaukee Mile. I was already beginning my planning to make this happen. But then, disaster struck. No race at the Mile this summer?!? Rats.
There was a decent article about the Top 5 Most Significant Moments in the Decade in NASCAR. I say decent, and with good damn reason. They got Jimmie Johnson’s Four-peat in there, and the death of Dale Earnhardt. But, for some reason that I simply can not fathom, they completely left out what is, in my mind, an easy pick for a top 5 story. Am I the ONLY person out here who remembers that fantastic season that Joe Nemechek had in 2006, when he finished 27th in the standings? I mean, seriously, how could this get left out?!
I have read some articles over the past couple of weeks about the new changes to the Bud Shootout for this year. Basically, as best as I can tell, the only big change is the fact that this year’s event will feature some octogenarians? 80 year olds, dude.
The good folks over at Speedway Media put together a solid list of the big stories in the NASCAR world coming up for 2010. Meanwhile, Jay Busbee at From the Marbles put together a list, complete with odds, for the possible breakout driver for the 2010 season. There, that saves me a lot of time. Thanks guys, because I do not have to cover all of that right now.
Speaking of Mr. Busbee, I went ahead and sent him this link, which will direct you to a $230 office chair that is decked out full Tony Stewart-style. Jay, if you are out there, this has “They Make it Cause We Buy It” slathered all over it. The chair is awful enough (it really is like a dopey Capt. Kirk chair knockoff, but with a big 14 on it), but as life works within the wonderous world of the internets, the comments turn into the entertaining portion of the article (complete with a Dick Trickle joke). Below, you will find my absolute favorite. I seriously can not stop laughing.
If you kids are not regularly checking over at All Left Turns, then you are missing out on the manhunt of the century. The folks there are trying to search for the gentleman in one of the more well-circulated NASCAR pictures. I can not be the only one out there who has had friends email this picture to him to poke fun at the guy who likes NASCAR. I hate my friends.
UPDATE: Yes, you read that word correctly. There has been an UPDATE. They are fast on the case. This is better than an episode of SVU, hopefully with a similar outcome…and cause.
Is this how NASCAR drug tests work?
How Denny Hamlin spends his off-season.
First question: Who the hell paid for this?
Second question: How big is 7.5 meters?
Third question: How do we get this transported from Paris to the Talladega infield?
Well guys, that is going to wrap up the first communication from me in the New Year. 2010 is looking promising on multiple fronts, and new decades are alright by me. But, before I go, who am I to dump on old traditions. I shall give the last word to my pals over at LOLNASCAR.
This one is funny because it is true. And this one is funny because it could be true.
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